Eli's Guide to Making Out with Girls
by Remotes
Summary: Maki really shouldn't be taking advice from someone like Eli
Maki mentally went through the list Eli gave her one last time. She was a bit skeptical at first, but once she thought it through, this list seemed absolutely foolproof, something an absolute imbecile would be able to do.

Normally she wouldn't ask Eli for this sort of advice. Scratch that. Normally she wouldn't ask _anyone_ for this sort of advice, but she was getting desperate and who better to go to for advice on making out with girls than Eli, the girl who, nine times out of ten, could be found in compromising positions inside the student council room with Nozomi.

Maki wiped her sweaty palms on her jeans. She hoped her nervousness went away quickly, but she couldn't help herself from feeling so anxious. Even though she felt she was pretty much guaranteed to get to second base (hopefully third), if she didn't execute the list perfectly, there would be no telling when her next chance would be.

There was no more time to lose. She had a small window to begin and a lull in the program they were watching offered the best opportunity for her to start.

 _Step 1. Put your arm around her shoulders and bring her in close._

This was something she had seen hundreds of times in movies so of course she could do this. Maki glanced at Nico sitting next to her on the couch and, as discreetly as she could, lifted her arm. It wasn't until it was up in the air that she realized that she was too far away to wrap it around Nico. She hadn't calculated the distance beforehand, much to her misfortune. She was only on the first step and she was already running into difficulties. How could she recover?

"Are you okay?" Nico asked. "You've had your arm raised for the last minute and haven't moved."

Maki jerked her arm down, jostling the bowl of popcorn between them, and glaring at the reason for their separation. "I was just stretching?" She wasn't sure why she made that into a question and she could only offer a small smile when Nico gave her a strange look. She let out a sigh of relief when she turned her attention back to the television. Time for attempt number two.

This time she would need to use all of the skills she has learned throughout her life in order to even complete the first step. Her initial stumble would not deter her and she could already see herself with her arms wrapped around Nico, their bodies pressed together as their mouths- Maki shook her head, she was getting ahead of herself before she had even started.

She decided to remove the offending bowl of popcorn to the coffee table and, in her haste to follow the list, tried sliding closer to Nico while also wrapping her arm around her. This act wasn't as smooth as she had envisioned and mistimed her movements, swinging her arm out uncontrollably.

"Ow! What the hell Maki?" Nico rubbed her arm, trying to comfort the pain. She looked just as perplexed as Maki felt. What on earth caused her to hit her?

"I-I'm sorry! I didn't mean to punch you," Maki stuttered, trying and failing to come up with a good excuse yet again. "It was just a, um, muscle spasm. It happens from time to time." Maki gave a small smile and shrugged her shoulders. She ignored the fact that this had never happened before.

Nico started move farther away. "We probably shouldn't sit too close in case that happens again then."

"No!" Maki yelled out, startling Nico. Maybe yelling wasn't the best way to assure Nico that she wasn't prone to uncontrollable tendencies. "I mean, that wasn't really a muscle spasm." She sighed and decided to tell the truth, unable to make eye contact. "I just wanted to get closer and accidentally hit you."

Nico stopped rubbing her arm at Maki's confession. "Oh Maki. If you want to come closer then just come closer." She moved over on the couch until she was leaning against Maki. "Like this. Better?"

Maki's arm naturally wrapped itself around Nico's shoulders in a comfortable embrace. "Much better."

Unbeknown to Nico, Maki silently celebrated her small victory. After such a rough start, it was a wonder that she was able to pull off step one. This was only the beginning though.

"Hey Nico?" Maki asked once they settled into each other. This was now or never.

"Yeah?"

Maki gulped and tried to calm the nerves that decided to resurface just as she was getting comfortable. "Is it okay if I kiss you?" It's not like they've never kissed before so she wasn't sure why she was so nervous. All of their kisses up to this point had been quick and chaste, whether it be on the lips or the cheek, but Maki knew that both of them wanted more, they just didn't know how to get past their shy touches.

Nico blushed and looked away in a seemingly out-of-character response. This just proved to Maki that she was just as nervous, but did little to help put herself at ease. She nodded her head and turned her body towards her's, head tilted up and eyes closed.

 _Step 2. Grab her chin and bring her in for a hard kiss._

Watching Nico, waiting for her to kiss her, entranced Maki. Her slightly puckered lips wanting her to swoop in and claim hers was a beautiful sight. She wished that she could stare all day.

It wasn't until she noticed Nico's furrowed eyebrows, signaling her confusion for why she hadn't kissed her yet. And why hadn't she kissed her yet? Maki sought to remedy this situation, but what constituted a "hard kiss"? Now that she thought more about it, she could not think of a way to go about this step. She would never doubt Eli's guide, but she wished it would be a bit more specific. Time was ticking though, and she couldn't wait any longer.

Maki took a deep breath and tried to give the best hard kiss she could, bringing her face down like how she would imagine a prince would do after he saved the princess. This, however, proved to be the wrong scenario. She should have imagined what a princess would have done.

"Maki!" Nico screamed in pain, shoving Maki away. She rubbed her now sore head.

"I'm sorry! Oh my god!" Maki also brought her hand up to her forehead and grimaced when she felt a bump. Injuring herself and her girlfriend was not part of the plan, she checked.

"What the hell is wrong with you?"

"I just want to kiss you!"

"Well I don't think you're doing it right."

Once the pain stopped Maki lowered her hand. "I'm just a bit nervous, okay? I didn't mean to headbutt you." It seemed like maybe making out wasn't meant to be and they would never be able to get any farther. She kept screwing up and maybe Nico didn't want to do anything anymore. But, just as all hope seemed lost, a miracle happened.

Nico gently placed her hands on Maki's cheeks, forcing her to face her, and slowly brought their mouths closer, her eyes closing. "Let me kiss you this time, softly," she whispered just before their lips touched. And soft it was. This was a kiss that was much more intimate than either of them ever expected.

Her lips, as cliche as it sounds, were almost like silk. Maki was finally able to relax and enjoy feeling her girlfriend's lips moving gingerly against hers. She no longer felt the weight of having to be the one that initiates the kiss and felt relieved that Nico still wanted to kiss her. Eli's list was slowly fading from her mind.

Nothing could ruin this moment.

 _Step 3. Shove your tongue down her throat as far as possible._

Even through the distraction that was Nico's lips, Maki could still remember the next part of the plan. This was the step she was most confident in. She was finally kissing her beautiful girlfriend and she knew that being gifted with an unusually long tongue would come in handy some day. She just never knew it'd be this day.

This would take an expertly timed movement right when Nico's lips slightly parted. Luckily she didn't have to wait too long and she quickly thrust her tongue past the soft lips and into the heat of Nico's mouth. She didn't notice Nico's closed eyes quickly open at the feeling of a slimy appendage suddenly entering her mouth and slithering down her throat.

"Mmmmm!" Nico pulled her face away, Maki's trailing trying to reattach their lips. "Hold on a second Maki."

Maki opened her eyes when she felt a hand cover her mouth and push. "Is something wrong?" she asked, slightly muffled. This time she was pretty sure she didn't mess up.

"You're just going a bit too fast." Nico responded and removed her hand when she was sure Maki wouldn't try to ravage her mouth again. "That was way too much."

"Really?" Maki tried to remember a time when she watched a movie where the lead female character looked like she didn't enjoy what she did. Usually she seemed like she wanted more from the lead male character. Could these movies have been lying to her? But what about Eli's guide? Was it wrong as well?

Nico nodded. "How about we start off slower and just feel each other's lips. Don't use your tongue so much this time. Mainly focus on my lips okay?" She closed the distance between them once more.

Maki wasn't sure if she should count step three as a success, but Nico still wants to kiss her so she'll take it. It also turns out that she should have let Nico lead from the beginning. This felt much better and much more natural than before. Instead of using her tongue so much, it was more of a complement to their kissing once and awhile. It was then that Maki realized that the entire time that she was trying to follow that stupid list, it was really Nico who guided things along.

They stayed together for a few more moments before separating and stared into eachother's eyes, unable to look away.

Maki had to catch her breath before speaking. She never thought that something like that could be so tiring. "That was really nice."

"Mmhm. Really good," Nico agreed. "But tell me, why were you acting so strangely before? It seemed like you were going through some sort of process something."

"Well, Eli said-"

"Wait a second." Nico interrupted. "Eli gave you advice? I knew this seemed familiar. This is exactly what Eli did when we were dating."

"I-is that the reason why you broke up?" Maki questioned. Perhaps Eli was trying to break them up. She wouldn't put it past her to try to get her back for the fake chocolate incident.

"Definitely not," Nico said while shaking her head. "We just decided we were better friends. It had nothing to do with the fact that she's a lousy kisser."

"How has she had so many girlfriends then?" Maki truly could not understand how someone like Eli was able to date what seemed like the entire school. Sure she may be the cute and clever Elichika, but still...

Nico turned her attention back to the television and reach for a handful of popcorn before answering. "This may be hard to believe, but a good relationship is more than just how good someone kisses."

"All right, all right, I get it," Maki huffed, but she wasn't willing to drop the subject just yet. "Who's a better kisser then? Me or Eli?"

"Eli," Nico answered nonchalantly.

"But I thought you said she was lousy," Maki said, offended by Nico's answer.

"Well she never accidentally hit me." Nico gave her a pointed look causing Maki to avert her eyes. "And even though she was very predictable and seemed to get all of her moves from movies and tv shows, it's not like I didn't enjoy it."

Maki couldn't stop the dejected sigh she let out. This was something she was hoping to be good at the first time. She was planning on surprising Nico with the awesome skills she got from the foolproof guide written by who she thought was an expert.

"Don't be upset. Eli may be better than you, but that just means we get to practice more."

* * *

Yo I hope you all enjoyed this somewhat silly nicomaki fic! Also, fun fact! I originally had 7 steps and it was probably going to end with sex, but it would have been waaay to long.


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